The commentary on this website is of Fair Use. If any portion is used, please give the website a back link

Over the years I have read so many books on, and have
gathered so many hand-outs regarding this subject matter that
my file and brain is overloaded with the differing view others
have formulated to help them understand and deal with emotions.

Many were conclusions that bored me to tears, as most appear
to have been written with the belief that each of us had come
from the same family dynamics, all having had the same

The writers who had actually experienced the emotions for
themselves were the only ones who truly impressed me.

This journey called "Life" never ends, in that, our beingness is ever lasting, no matter what form it may take, be it spirit, or
when spirit takes physical form. Spirit beings are given short bouts within the lower 3D physical realms of consciousness in
order to collect their thoughts, to experience the physical form where physical sights and sounds abound, where emotions
are felt, understood and balanced..

I, like most males have felt the gantlet of male emotions. I have felt depression, rejection, anger and rage. I have been a
prisoner of my own pride and hatred for my-self and others. I finally realized the meaning of love rather than lust. I finally
learned how to love others despite my perceptions of them. I now have endured almost every emotion a man can feel.

Emotions are not good, nor bad, they just are. To feel physical emotion is why many of us are here. Feeling all the creation
has to offer is our duty to the one infinite creator whom lives, feels and expresses its-self through us, its manyness.

Here is an excerpt from a paper I wrote while training to work in the field of recovery. Although the below examples are
rather extreme, I feel they are relevant because if we do not learn to express our emotions through a controlled release
process, some of us have a propensity towards mental break downs.

“Delusions brought on by depression can cause people to have false beliefs that are inconsistent with reality. People with
these delusions report odd disease and many insist that their body and or brain is disintegrating. Biological studies have
theorized that low nonepinephrine levels in the brain can cause these delusions.

Cognitive theorists theorize that depression is a learned behavior. They believe that people who have not learned proper
social, or coping skills are punished for their, what they perceive as dysfunctional behavior. Therefore, these see the world
as adverse and depressing. These specialists believe that people are shamed into depression. This theory believes that
children learn depression from their close family members.

Depressed people feel they do not have ample support. Therefore, this lack of security creates a even more depressing
state of mind for them. Some theorize that depression comes after people begin to feel they can not control their negative

(Here is a rather unique view of Schizophrenia that one of my professor's professor wrote) covers
a wide range of mental disorders. This disorder is characterized by a lack of having a logical thought processing center, and
by the deterioration of social functioning. Because they are unable to cope with an ordinary life style symptoms develop
causing significant changes in the thought process, perception, mood, and their overall behavior begins to deteriorate over

Delusions of persecution are brought on by a world that is charged with their perception of negative responses. The
schizophrenic can even receive feelings of grandeur believing that they are an important person in society.

Hallucinations of the perceptual type, visual, tactile, olfactory, or auditory are brought on by unseen forces. Auditory
hallucinations appear to be the most well known of the symptoms. People have reported hearing voices from within their
heads. These voices seem to cause the individual shame for acting out in a socially unacceptable behavior.

Some people have reported that some of these voices give symbolic advice on how to live within socially acceptable
boundaries, whereas others encourage unacceptable behavior using obnoxious voices.”

It is apparent to me that fear causes the brain’s neurotransmitters to flood certain chemicals while others are held back, but
all causing an imbalance that would normally help maintain homeostasis. Then the out of balance system allows for adverse
feelings to begin. I believe it is fear that is passed from parent to the child, therefore, it must be the fear that is the learned

However, after years of living and working with those who are suffering, I have discovered that the support of others can,
and will help relieve the pain of unwanted emotional bondage. But rest assured there are those who enjoy the attention,
thus have a difficult time relinquishing their emotional bondage over others.

If those who are suffering feel they need medication until they feel comfortable enough to join a support group, by all means
get them medication. However, be careful because no addiction takes long to close the gap.

Emotions are neither good nor bad, they just are. All negative emotions are statements made to express fear, and I am often
lead to believe that even pride finds its foundation in fear.

Why are we so fearful you ask? We live in a constant state of fear that we will be deprived of what we require the most; Love.
Anger is one of the best examples of this statement. When we do not get our way, we often pout or throw a fit. All negative
emotions serve the soul purpose of expressing our lack of feeling loved, heard and understood by others.

Anger Desires Control! If we can not control our need for love, we then go to work trying to control our lover or loved ones
through a series of emotions hoping to place them within a type of bondage to our needs. Women often use the entire
smorgasbord to be heard! When everything else fails, we then resort to anger to acquire our need for love and acceptance.

Because love is a willing dependency placed on others, feeling the loss of love, or not feeling that we have been heard and
understood cuts at the very core of our being. Now that we understand why we are so complicated, and how we use that
complication to our disadvantage, let us now explore anger.

Let us now set the rules of engagement regarding anger. Emotions are designed to teach us lessons. Therefore, when a
negative emotion surfaces, ask it where it is coming from. One must learn to ask the correct questions in order to receive
the correct answers. One must learn how to express their feelings in an honest, rational and logical manner. The higher-self,
or over-soul is a mind reader. However, if you wish to know your-self, you must ask how then become willing to begin a long


Dr. Stan Hyman
Ph.D., LCSW lists various techniques to help cope with anger on his website (HERE)

The material on my Healing the Spirit-self (HERE) may also help in copying with negative emotions.

Anyone can theorize, but until you have been there and felt what others
have felt, no one can tell you what you felt, nor can anyone tell you what you
are currently feeling. Everyone is as different as a finger print. We may be able
to recognize similar traits and witness similar reactions to events, but again,
no two people react to the same stimulus in the same way.

We often allow ourselves to cause our past experiences to define who we are,
causing us to become human doings protecting ourselves from our harms,
rather than being human beings allowing ourselves to be made whole by our
own past experiences.

We form protective illusions. In that, we wish, we seek, we hope for better
people, places and things that we believe will fill the empty void, rather than
seeking a true understanding of our-self which begins to slowly transforms the
way we think about our-self, and the world around us. Therefore, most continue
to remain within a strong propensity to fear everything, including our own-self.

There is a battle wagging within, and the only way to win is to know thy self.
Conflict Resolution

Coping Skills

Welcome to Focus on Recovery's
Understanding Mental Health